


Not all mothers love their eggs

by Oliver99



Series: Attack on Space [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alien Genders, Body Dysphoria, But all in the past, Character Development, Cyberpunk, Dysphoria, F/M, Genderbending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Multi, Past Child Abuse, Prostitution, Science Fiction, Space Battles, Space Ships, Species Dysphoria, Strangers to Lovers, Underage Prostitution, fuck gender roles, i guess, space travel, there will be smut, universe - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-15 16:25:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18673282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oliver99/pseuds/Oliver99
Summary: A used-t-be-original-now-a-fanfiction work about a half Human, half Alien -  Kahari Mantis.His childhood left far too many scars on him to be "normal". Rejected by most others because of his mixed blood or his mother's identity, he worked onboard of a glorious freetrader. An unpredictable turn of events throws him out of his life and into the ranks of the Survey Corps. Here, he will have a chance for respect and normality he never dreamed of, a chance to prove himself, to make a better life for himself and for others. And maybe… for something more?





	Not all mothers love their eggs

**Author's Note:**

> I obviously don't own Attack on Titan. Though the story is mine, some elements were inspired by works of others and belong to their rightful authors and not me. So far those are: Whaleship (I can't find it's creator, I was inspired by this gorgeous photo: https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/386394843004615436/ If any of you know who the author is, please let me know in the comments)
> 
> If there are any mistakes, please pardon me, but English is not my native language and even thou I check, some things I just don't notice. 
> 
> Inspired by "Humans are Weird" on Tumblr.

Kahari walked the entire way from the main cargo bay to the bridge in complete silence. It was not often that the captain requested his presence. After all, he was not an officer or a yeoman, not even an engineer, just a regular crew member working on board of this glorious freetrader. 

For those who didn't know better, the Nascic Trade Fleet's ship classification was incomprehensible. For Kahari, however, who not only served on this ship for last five years, but was also raised in a space port city, it was simple. 

The Nascis was the greatest trade fleet on this side of the Universe, possessing over 3 thousand ships of different class and purpose. There were 6 basic sections of ships: Amonites, heavily armoured to transport weaponry, ammunition and other dangerous cargo, Mussels for transporting valuable and delicate cargo, Rays for all forms of livestock, Walruses to transport ships, mechanics and ship parts, SpaceTurtles for fuel of all kinds, and Freetraders, also known as Whaleships, for everything that didn't fit in the other categories, everything related to common retail trade. 

Aside from those categories, there were classes, that related to the size of the ship. That perhaps was what confused those who didn't spend a great portions of their lives surrounded by those ships, as the criteria for each class were slightly different for each section. For example only Whaleships and Walruses reached class C, commonly called Colossal, but the C-class Walruses were bigger than C-class Whaleships. People often seamed to forget that Nascis alphabet had a completely different sequence than most others, and therefore got confused about the sequence of ship classes as well. Why was A the smallest was understandable. But after A-class ships were D, B, S, F and C classes, which made no sence for those who remained ignorant to cultural background of the Nascic Trade Fleet. 

Another thing that needed some cultural background knowledge for understanding was the way the ships were named and why were they in shapes of animals to whom they owed their names. The planet of Nascis was mostly covered in water, small islands dropped here and there, far away from eachother, so it was only logical that they chose to name their ships as something familiar and shape them in a way that imitated the biology of those beings. 

There was an actual reason why Kahari's thought ventured to those areas - not long ago they enrolled a newbie, with no knowledge whatsoever, in any area necessary for doing his job propperly - a favor of captain's for one of the higher-ups. As the only crewmember with a contract nearing the expisation date and with no intention of renewing it, the pleasure of showing him the ropes fell on Kahari's ash-haired head like a brick. He understood the captain's reasons, but that didn't mean he liked the outcom - the boy was young, overzealous and way too unexperienced to be left out of sight, otherwise they would be risking damage to their cargo, and that was unacceptable. 

With those thoughts roaming in his mind, the young halfblood arrived to the bridge and spotted his captain standing near the first officer, talking in hushed voices. The captain, as a pure-blooded Nasci, was over two meters tall, with dark-blue skin and pure white hair. His nose and cheeks were dusted in small shining dots that made him look like the night sky, his race's equivalent of freckles. They were also visible on his crossed forearms, where the sleeves of his brown uniform were rolled up. 

Kahari walked slowly to him and stopped once he reached a respectable distance. Then, he stood on attention and saluted with two fingers of his left hand touching briefly the area of his sternum, speaking in fluent Nascian:

"Captain Gym'khar, crewman Kahari Mantis reporting. You wished to see me, sir?"

The formality was a must on any respectable vessel, even if it wasn't strictly military. The Fleet had an army-like organisation, with proper ranks and salute, even thou they weren't soldiers per se. 

"At ease, rep." - said the captain, before nodding curtly to his officer, dismissing them. Rep was a therm from Nascian language, an equivalent of "soldier" in military units, adopted by most civilian fleets in the Universe. Hearin it, Kahari relaxed and stood more comfortably. Well, as comfortably as one can when they measure only 1.7 meter and try to maintain eye contact with someone so much higher than them. 

Gym'khar's four narrow, silver eyes methodically scanned his uniform, vaguely searching for any contradiction to the norms. Founding none in his soft, fitted, brown pants, clean leather boots and sleeveless top, he nodded absently and motioned for Kahari to follow him. He said nothing about the ugly green scarf around his neck - many members of the crew added personal touches to their uniforms, and there were no regulations concerning this. 

With the first officer taking the role of acting captain, they left the bridge behind, walking the outer corridor towards the caudal fin of the whale ship. The young man recognised the way leading to the mess hall, lying exactly in the middle of the ship. 

"Tell me, how is our new recruit doing?" - he asked politely, as they walked slowly side by side. The smaller one wondered for a moment how to express his thoughts on the matter before replying:

"I'm not going to lie to you, captain. He's not perfect, easily distracted, overzealous and unexperienced. But he learns, however slow, and genuinely wants to be useful. I believe that with some guidance, he will become a valuable member of the crew."

The captain only hummed for that, considering what he heard. 

"I remain nervous when thinking of what will happen once he no longer has you to watch over him."

"I suggest finding someone else to do that, at least untill he leans when to come get someone more experienced, and when to do things on his own. He wants to prove himself, it appears, so he often tries to do alone what should be done by more people."

Few other crew members they passed nodded respectfully to their captain, but didn't salute. On non-military ships that wasn't required, unless in a strictly professional situation, which obviously wasn't passing someone in the corridor. 

"Your home planet is Raqsis, correct? The city of Mantis, like your last name?" Asked the captain politely. 

"Yes, sir."

"Then you would be glad to hear that, even thou our next destination is Gathar, not far from your home planet, not long ago I received an information from the headquarters, that we are to stop off in Mantis to pick up some commodity and head back to our main course. So we can actually drop you off in your city around the date of your contract's expiration. That is, if you haven't changed your mind."

Kahari felt a pang of amusement at that. A corner of his thin, pale lips twitched in a human expressive way, commonly known as smiling. He got a hold of himself however, knowing better than to bare his three pairs of long, curved fangs in what most others would see as a threat. Instead he slowly moved his forked tongue over the top two pairs, gently probing at the small space between them. He often did that when thinking. It was better than the dirty habit of picking at the small patches of reptilian scaled skin on his cheek (on of the Humans working with him called it snake-like), as he did as a child. His father's spouse made sure to beat it out of him, once he came to live with them. 

Finally, the response came:

"Captain, while I am happy to hear yet again that you are willing to keep me as your crewman, I miss my family greatly. I'm sure there will be something for me to do back in Mantis, where I can be close to them. I haven't seen them in a long, long time, sir."

He was sure this would be sufficient. Captain had his own family, after all. His wife, Var'xsmi, was one of his officers, a beautiful mix of Nascis and human race, with pale blue skin and red hair. Gym'khar loved her greatly and would certenly understand what it was like to miss someone. Kahari liked his wife a lot, she was a fierce and yet kind person, and being half human himself, he was able to connect with her easily. 

Captain nodded slowly, silently agreeing with his logic. 

"I understand. Thou, if I am to be honest, I believed the familial bonds aren't really strong amongst Raqsian kind. I know, of course, that you bond strongly with mates and, for some time, with your offspring, but I didn't expect you to be so close to them."

The corner of his mouth raised again. 

"Have in mind, sir, that I am half human, and humans are known for their social instincts and strong bonding."

By that time they reached the mess hall, just in time for supper. With a captain so sociable it was easy to forget their positions, sometimes. Unlike many others, captain Gym'khar cared for the bonds between crew members, regardless of their positions and races, and therefore chose not to distance himself from them, eating with everyone in the mess hall for example. They took their trays and walked to the window connecting the mess hall with the kitchen, taking a look at the small screen where todays menu was displayed, written in three different languages most common amongst the crew members. Asking and taking their chosen dishes, they said their goodbyes and parted their ways to seat with their closest friends. Space had no day/night rhythm, so they counted time by shifts. Three shifts made one cycle, one "day". Having just finished his shift in cargo bay, Kahari had two shifts for himself, untill time came to work again. The shifts changed between one mooring and another, so often he didn't see his friends for a long time if they didn't share shifts on this particular course, especially as they were randomly assigned by the computer. 

Kahari made his way to the table in the corner, sitting on a bench between a tall Human he didn't know and his friend, Mahri. Mahri was an Othrix, one of the most exotic races in this quadrant of the galaxy, about 1.8 meters in hight, his skin covered by many hard plates in different shades of purple, with points of bright yellow, like his eyes. One of their common human friends called him a 'butterfly', whatever that was. They acted like it was a compliment, so the nickname stuck. 

"What are you guys talking about?" He asked the others sitting at the table. 

"Oh, we were just getting to know the new guy. He joined a few courses ago, but we've never met before." Answered Aria, nonchalantly mowing away her bright green hair that touched her rosy cheeks. 

At that, Kahari turned to his right and looked at the newcomer. He was very tall, his soft skin a deep brown shade, dark hair very short, a thin, neatly trimmed mustache above his full lips. His uniform showed his muscled arms and hands with many small scratches, scars and cuts. 

"Let me guess - you're an engineer." He smiled, but kept his lips closed, obviously caring about his manners - an unusual thing among humans who, more often than not, smiled without any consideration of others being from non-smiling races. 

"Precisely. Michel Grayson, new engineer, freshly graduated from Colony 12 Engineering Academy." With that, he extended his hand in a human sign of greeting. Kahari took it out of respect for his culture, even thou he didn't really like to be touched. 

"Kahari Mantis, I work at the main cargo bay."

"Not for long, unfortunately." - Mahri cut in with soft clicking of amusement.- "He's leaving us soon, that homebody."

"I told you, I don't have any precise plans for near future. I hope to find something back in my hometown, live a little. Maybe I'll come back at some point. Now, all I want is to finally bask in some sunlight."

A wave of laughter came by the table. 

"What, space's too cold for your Raqsian ass?" Joked Aria. 

"I've been turning that stupid Heating Lamp in my cabin on more often than not lately. I mean, I understand that most of our crew prefers cool air, but seriously, I'm freezing over here! Good thing I work phisically or I'd end up as an ice-cube." They laughed again and Kahari turned to his food, not wanting it to get cold. It was one of his favourites, inspired by a Terran dish, but with ingredients more fitting for the other races stomachs. He dug a spoon into the long rice turned yellow with spices, taking with it some "stew" made of delicious fish meat and various vegetables, sprinkled with tiny roasted crickets. At that, Aria wrinkled her nose in distaste. 

"I still don't get how you can eat that." Here we go again - thought Kahari. 

"We've discussed that. It's a normal part of my diet, even some Humans eat their Terran crickets so stop making that face. It's ruining my appetite."

"I told you a zillion times, I'll never believe Terrans eat THAT."

"We do. At least in some regions of our world." Michel cut in. 

"So you come from Terra?" Kahari became interested. 

"Yes, I do. I lived there as a kid, but then I got stipend and we had to move to Colony 12. I always wanted to get to their Academy, so we made some arrangements and got there. So I can assure you, some people do eat crickets." 

Aria frowned at that, but said no more, gently moving the long, thin spikes on both sides of her neck to show irritation and turning back to her plate filled with blue soup. 

"Since you're just out of the academy, how did you get to work on the biggest Whaleship in this fleet? You're really that good?" Asked curiously Mahri. 

"I don't want to boast, but there are always reasons for the Academy to give stipends. I just love engineering, so it comes easy to me." answered Michel. 

"Since you apparently know what you're doing, maybe you could take a look at the actuators on the ramp number 4 in my cargo bay? I told them about it several times already, but since it's not the main ramp, they always have something more important coming up. I'm gonna go mad because of that screeching..." Complained the young half-blood. 

"Sure, I'll take a look at it as soon as I can." 

With that, he felt satisfied and the conversation flowed on its own. Sometimes he catched Michel looking at him on his peripheral vision, concentrating on specific aspects of his apparition. He knew the Human noticed his eyes. He didn't have the reptilian eyes of pure Raqsian, instead, he had soft and round pupils of a human, and bicolor irises: right one pale, cold blue, left one black as space bared of stars. He also glanced at the small patches of snakeskin where his uniform didn't cover him. His scales gently catched the light, pearly white, yet iridescent with entire spectrum of colours when looked at from different angles. They gently faded into pale, human-like skin, and looked soft. He didn't have nearly as much of them as a pure-blood would, but it was enough not to feel self-conscious around other Raqsians. He could see one on his left cheekbone and a tiny one on the right side of his jaw, a bigger one vanishing beneath the scarf on his neck. Here and there they adorned his arms, the outside of his right wrist. He got a glimpse of his hands - identical to human ones - when he absent-mindedly moved a stray hair from his eyes to the neat hairstyle. His ashy hair was gathered together above his forehead and tied with a hairband, then again a bit lower, and again, untill they ended in a ponytail touching his shoulders. It revealed his ears, only a tiny bit pointy, unlike those of other Raqsians. 

At some point Kahari raised a cup to his lips and, without turning his head, spoke in English, one of more commonly known human languages: "It is impolite to stare at people." His accent was off, too hissing, too rough, with a hard "r" that didn't belong in this language, but the message came across and made the conversation stop, and the Human turn his head, as the words were clearly directed at him. It was quiet for a moment, untill Michel muttered an embarrassed "Sorry" and Aria decided to save the mood by making a joke. 

Kahari hated it when people stared at him. Hated it almost as much as being touched by them. No matter what race or gender or intention, he hated it. This Michel guy just ruined a good first impression he managed to make... 

Kahari lingered a bit longer, in order to make sure no-one thought he left because of the incident, but simply because he was done and tired. Which was true, even thou there wasn't nearly as much work to be done when they were flying as there would be before, during and shortly after they stopped at a port. The presence of a newbie was a nuisance, and he decided to do a very hard workout before his shift, so he was quite drained. 

As soon as he reached his small cabin, he took his stuff and went to shower. They all had communal showers, there was no way to get a lot of privacy with 200 people on board, but Kahari found a way. Near this part of the vessel was a part that served as additional cabins for rare situations when their cargo demanded a more numerous crew to deal with it. That meant that, not far from his own cuddy there was an unocupied part, an unoccupied communal shower. Technically it went against their statute, but it wasn't a great "crime" and, if found out, would only result in a reprimand, but it would mean showering with others from that point on, so he remained careful. 

He hated being nude, or other people being nude around him, or the thought of anyone seeing him naked or worse, desiring to do anything physical with him. It disgusted him beyond all measure, so he chose not to take any chances. 

His shower was thorough and quick, so once he returned to his cabin he felt more calm and collected. He dried off his hair with a towel and lied on his narrow, but comfortable enough bed, turning on a heating lamp above it to get warm. Sighing with content at the temperature raising, he got under his orange blanket and got comfy on his stomach, hugging a pillow. His finger absent-mindedly traced a long, thin scar across his throat, as if to remind himself of the past. 

"I have no regrets." He thought to himself as he fell asleep.


End file.
